Conversations about weight #6

This is essentially a continuation of my last conversations about weight post and could easily be titled shit people say or Fleur having another rant. When I was younger, skinnier and more ignorant I had a friend that called out my diet bullshit – honestly one of the best things that ever happened to me was when she told me to fuck off when I said I felt fat after a big meal ❤ SO, when I get it wrong because I’m human – call me out.

I’m not going to lie; this is inspired by comments from my mum, some of the people I work with and a few people on Twitter. If they see this, yeah, it’s kind of shitty that I don’t feel able to call you out on this in person. Soz.

This one really gets to me “They’re always exercising but they never seem to lose weight!” Maybe, just maybe they’re not exercising to lose weight? Maybe they’re exercising because they enjoy it, or is that too radical an idea? Or maybe they have lost weight but you just didn’t notice. Maybe running is their stress relief, combined with a Chinese takeaway because their life is falling apart. Maybe you just need to stop judging people on their weight.

They’ve really let themselves go!” Or “I’m hoping she’s pregnant because otherwise she’s really let herself go…” Or  “it’s not like you to put on this weight” Or “She must be pregnant. She’s not the type of person to let herself go.” Where do you even start with that? Especially if you’re stood next to someone saying those things, when you’ve also stacked on weight 👍🏻 when someone loses or gains weight, pretty much no one except them knows why and there are SO many reasons. This post explains the reasons I put on weight. Putting on weight isn’t letting yourself go, our bodies are designed to squirrel away everything we eat. We’re programmed to try and put on weight, it’s quite literally what evolution has left us with.

Then there’s a person I know who compared their potentially anorexic friend to a Belsen survivor. I can’t even go there. I’m just going to leave it here and if you can’t work out why it’s horrendous, I’m actually unwilling to help.

How good does that Dominos look? Even 5 stone lighter I had regular Dominos #JustSaying

Also, always treating weight loss as a great thing. “Ooh, have you lost weight? Fantastic!” It might not be though? Yeah, for me and my body right now, weight loss is fantastic. The health conditions I have were severely worsening and are now improving since I started losing weight. However, there are so many people who need to put on weight to have a positive impact on their health. The constant ‘ooh weight loss yay’ comments probably aren’t helpful? Please do correct me if I’m wrong ❤

Alongside the point above the comments of “oh you’re so healthy, eating … for lunch, you’re making me feel bad” insert salad, soup etc with no carbs. Are you sure thooooo? Wouldn’t it be better if it was a balanced meal? Not just some vegetables? Your sandwich probably isn’t that bad…

The constant putting down of Slimming World and Weight Watchers. Calling it ‘Fat Fighters’. So many people I know have transformed their lives using those services. What’s SO wrong with them? Why scorn people for deciding to try to lose weight, especially if you constantly scorn fat people for being fat? Feck off. I wish there were similarly easily accessible, well promoted groups like them for people who need to gain weight (I know I haven’t seen any near me).

Finally, there is no one solution for everyone to lose/gain/maintain weight. We’re all SO different. So saying “I just exercise more/less”, “you need to eat x number of calories less/more”, “you need to cut out carbs, EVERYONE NEEDS TO CUT OUT CARBS”. Ugh *rolls eyes* you do you.

xo Fleur xo

Etsy Wish List

I may have only just done an Etsy haul but I’m already looking at more things I want to buy! *face palm* I’ve been looking at some of these things for a really long time and others are new discoveries.
Etsy Wish List


Unicorn Print UV Leggings
£40 –

These look absolutely incredible! If I was still at uni and going to UV parties I would buy these without hesitation… I think they may have to be a treat once I’ve lost a little more weight. Also, they’re not even that expensive when you consider how much yoga/running leggings cost!

Unicorn Pin
£9.62 –

How cute is this? I’ve bought things from I Love Crafty’s Etsy shop before and they’ve been amazing (in particular I love her ‘I’m really a mermaid’ necklaces). I don’t know what I’d do with a pin badge but it’s just so cute!

California Skies Ocean Wood Phone Case
Price dependent on phone model –

I love getting new phone cases and wooden ones are just so nice to hold. I think this one looks really sleek and smart. I really like that the photo is of the ocean too.
I don’t know how I haven’t bought this already?! I mean, it’s the cutest! I’ve always loved stickers and since I started keeping a vague journal of things like which books I’ve read – I finally have something to stick them in!
Last year I got a wax melter for my birthday. I don’t love the scents you can buy in the supermarket to go in them though – I’m also left only with Christmas scented Yankee Candle melts now. This company makes ones that sound like they’d smell amazing – they’re also super affordable so I need to get on and buy some already!
Do you like shopping on Etsy? I’d love to know some of your current picks!

xo Fleur xo

Etsy Haul

I love Etsy and have done for years now. My mum has been making kiln-formed glass art and jewellery for over 30 years now; so supporting artists, craftspeople and just individuals over large companies has been a big part of my life. I’m not always as good at this as I might like to be but Etsy provides an easy way to do this. As does following some incredible people on Twitter and Instagram.

So here is a little Etsy haul, including things from some of my favourites. I’ll link to their Etsy shops too, just ya know if you fall in love with any of these too 😉

Isn’t this perfect? It made me laugh so much that I knew I had to have it up on the walls of my study. It’s created by the amazing Veronica Dearly who has all kinds of awesome items.

One of my resolutions this year was to write letters to the friends who sent me Christmas cards. I still haven’t got round to this but now I have some super cute cards to write in, hopefully I will! I also couldn’t turn down the fridge magnets and unicorn pin badge! These are from Llama Talks and I’m completely obsessed with her entire shop, you need to check it out!

If you follow me on Twitter or Instagram you’ll probably know I’ve become obsessed with the game Overwatch. When I found these adorable stickers and fridge magnets from AboutToon I had to buy them for my OH and I.

Both the print and stickers above are from Jemma from Dorkfaceshop. Again the print made me laugh so I had to buy it (and if we switched out the coffee for tea, it’s so me). The stickers were raising money for Planned Parenthood and they’re exactly how I’m feeling at the moment. I’m kind of done with being nice and that resulting in me being walked all over. So I’m going to be a super supportive, nasty woman.

Finally but potentially the most ‘me’ item… This stunning Ariel the Little Mermaid print from Tarnya from Sweet Allure Shop. I’ve wanted to buy this for ages and I’m so happy I now own it!

What are your favourite Etsy shops? I’m always looking for more gorgeous things to add to my life!

xo Fleur xo

Conversations about weight #5

I hope you all had a wonderful Wednesday! Today I helped out on a school trip to the Imperial War Museum and HMS Belfast, so I’m pretty tired but both were really interesting so it was a good day. I’m secretly obsessed with ships I swear, clearly too many trips to the historical docks in Portsmouth as a child!

This is another of my conversations about weight posts and today I wanted to talk about things that I’d really appreciate stopping. It may be a little harsh but I know several serial offenders for each!

People asking how much weight you’ve lost (and it’s probably just as annoying if people constantly ask how much weight you’ve gained). I get that they’re trying to be supportive but it’s so personal! When I’ve reached a milestone, I’ll tell people. Otherwise it’s just a bit awkward, especially if it’s after a few days where you’ve struggled and put on/lost weight. Obviously if they’re your doctor/person you’re on the same journey with that’s very different.

The aches and pains brigade! At what point did it become socially acceptable to come into work and moan all day about how your legs hurt because you ran 5 miles yesterday (when it’s someone who does that every week)? Or people poking themselves and going ‘ouch’ after an exercise class. If it’s completely involuntary because your muscles are actually destroyed/you’re covered in blisters –  yeah, I get that. Otherwise it’s just weird boasting of who managed to make themselves hurt the most.

Telling people about every single bit of exercise you do. Recently I’ve been going swimming most days, until yesterday when my boobs went flying during aqua aerobics I didn’t really feel the need to inform anyone of this! Of course, celebrate the awesome things. Celebrate the personal bests, celebrate being able to go further and get excited about trying new things! Just when it’s always the same, it gets a bit tiresome tbh.

^ that’s me feeling super awesome. EVEN if I am a size 18-20 and obese. I’ve always had to stick my chin out if I don’t want a double chin, even at the very bottom of my healthy BMI. So LOL

Calling food ‘naughty’. I’ll probably say this a million times but unless you’re a kid stealing from the cookie jar/sweet store – the food you’re eating isn’t ‘naughty’. You’re not a three year old, unless you are in which case yeah, keep calling that food naughty. It’s also not bad or evil or any of those other words. It’s just food. Some of it is arguable healthier than others but none of it is bad. Okay if it’s mouldy/rotten, then yeah it’s gone bad.

The constant ‘oh dear they’ve put on weight’, ‘they’re looking really good now they’ve lost that weight’. Or we could just not discuss people’s weight? Their weight has no bearing on whether they’re an awesome person… Also, the idea that because someone has lost weight they automatically look/feel better? Flawed. Bar the crippling acid reflux I’ve never felt more comfortable in my body.

The thought that you can’t have an indulgent weekend of eating whatever you desire without putting on a stone. Even when I was at my worst mentally this year, it took me 6 months to put on 2 stone. Six months. Okay, I am really active but it shows that it does take a long time to put on significant amounts of weight. One weekend/week/holiday isn’t going to RUIN EVERYTHING.

I think that’ll do for now 😉 Do you agree with these? Or do you think I need to chill out haha?

xo Fleur xo

Birthday Wish List

As my birthday is coming up (15th February, eeek!) I wanted to put together a wish list. I love wish lists in general, seeing the things people are really wanting to buy. As I have some Christmas money I haven’t spent yet and I may get some money for my birthday, these are the things I’ll probably end up treating myself to.
Birthday Wish List

NYX Cosmic Metal Lip Cream
These look SO gorgeous! I want all the shades tbh but I’d really love a green. I’ve been loving orange eyeshadow looks and the combination with a green lipstick is one I think is gorgeous. Purple is also pretty awesome.

Anastasia Beverly Hills Modern Renaissance Palette
I’m still not 100% decided on whether I truly want this but it does look so gorgeous. I know I’d be able to create both looks for work and more dramatic looks with it. Plus it’s just so Instagramable LOL

BH Cosmetics Foil Eyes Palette
I want to add to my collection of foiled eyeshadows and the price of this palette is so reasonable. There are more neutral shades than I’d like but there are some gorgeous shades to bring out my inner mermaid.

Sugarpill U4EA Lipstick
Just look at it! I’ve wanted a teal lipstick for a while now and this one looks like perfection.

Sugarpill Pro Pan Eyeshadows
Sugarpill eyeshadows look like and are reviewed as the most dreamy colourful eyeshadows. I can’t justify buying these for myself, so using present money might be the answer…

Milani Luminoso Blush
Everyone and their dog talks about this on YouTube and it looks like a shade I’d love and wear every day. I’d also really like to add Makeup Geek’s Secret Admirer blush to my collection, oh and all their highlighters for pale skin *heart eyes*

MUA Luxe Velvet Lip Lacquer – No Shrinkin Violet set
I’ve got one of the MUA liquid lipsticks and it’s actually amazing for the price. I want to add a few more fantasy shades to my collection and this selection looks so pretty.
I love having my birthday in February, I think February is like the Tuesday of months. Too far from Christmas and too far from spring/summer. It’s usually a gloomy month, full of rain and cold. So having my birthday in the middle of it means I’m always excited and I get to do fun birthday things!

xo Fleur xo

Film Review: Hacksaw Ridge

Having seen the film Hacksaw Ridge on Tuesday, I really wanted to post a review of it on my blog. I thought the film was absolutely incredible, so thought I’d take a break from my normal content! Maybe I can review more random things in future…

I’m not going to discuss the plot because I think the trailer gives the perfect insight into the film, which isn’t always the case with trailers!

Hacksaw Ridge shows war in a way I know I’ve never felt before. I know Saving Private Ryan is supposed show how awful war can be but, obviously apart from the initial rush, it feels like you could cope, could survive war. With Hacksaw Ridge that definitely isn’t the case. It shows this terrifying, beyond loud, absolutely impossible situation where their survival seems completely out of their hands. It is a situation which I would never want to be in and makes PTSD appear almost a logical conclusion.

Hacksaw Ridge also shows the amazing contrast of how wonderful humanity can be against how awful, how destructive, how horrifying we can be. That it is a true story only makes that resound even more. I think stories like these need to be told, to remind us of all the courageous people who have done incredible things. It’s inspiring that someone could be so courageous and strong, to stick with their principles no matter what was thrown at them.

If you watch the trailer and are interested in the story, go and watch it. It is brilliantly acted and directed. It is horrifying and uplifting in equal measures, it may leave you feeling emotionally drained like it did me but aren’t those the best films?

xo Fleur xo


Conversations about weight #4

So, it’s officially February and hopefully that means the toxic January diet talk will have ended or come close to ending. I’m really hoping it will. I swear my heart hurt when I saw a colleague mentally beating herself up about eating a doughnut.

I may be trying (and succeeding) to lose weight to improve my health but I’ll keep eating chocolate, pizzas and onion bhajis without guilt thanks. On which note, if you didn’t get to try Dominos Indian pizzas you really missed out, it was a few years ago now and I still miss it. Having onion bhajis on a pizza? It was the best thing ever.

I don’t know why but this January I kept thinking about the show ‘Supersize vs Superskinny’ – possibly one of my mumma’s favourite TV shows and therefore one I unfortunately saw a few too many times. The entire idea of the show is slightly horrifying now I think back on it but the line that keeps popping up in my mind is this one:

“You’re so skinny and eating so little that your body is eating itself.”

I am paraphrasing here but I just remember thinking about that phrase and finding it the most awful concept. I mean, eating itself, blergh.

YET when people are losing weight, regardless of what weight they start at – their body is eating itself. Instead of using the food we’ve eaten for energy, we’re eating ourselves. It’s just a natural part of being human. If we don’t use our muscles enough we start breaking them down. In fact, our bodies are constantly breaking down old cells and making new ones… So, yeah.


Onto something else that’s been bugging me, I’m so done with people saying ‘oh fat people just need to move more’ or even ‘they need to get off their arse and move’. Below are my steps for last Monday-Saturday, tell me again how I’m not moving enough?

Being fat doesn’t mean I’m not (relatively) fit and active! I know when I did have a healthy BMI, I was often outpaced in exercise classes by people who were (most likely, like I am now) obese.

I hope your January went well and the constant dieting talk wasn’t too stressful, whether you’re trying to lose, gain, maintain or don’t give a flying fuck about your weight ❤️

xo Fleur xo